Pravanchans for Surviving Down Under….and rants about being the younger turk(ey)

Pravachans from vaddi pa(i)n If not heeded to there has been insinuation to an outbreak of violence in the prison continent... desi ishytle...And anyways one has to be at ones best when one is at vaddi pa(i)n's mayka...
We must at all cost hide our true dna disposition to be loud, garish and unseemly hideous..... punjabi by nature, praaji!!

So following were the pravachans...

1. Be Culturally Smart … aka read as much about Convict's paradise.
2. Its not a crime to drink ok…Don’t be a sadhoo. Dont say no to beah, ok!!!
3. Wear Shorts while on a beach.. Show some skin on the beach motoo!!!
4. Be social….talk to people
5. Eat with a fork
6. One morsel at a time ok. And learn to keep the fork on the plate.
7. Make a funny speech, ok
8. Learn to drink ok… Don’t be a sadhoo. Dont say no to beah, ok!!!

Oh how I wish I was the only child or in other words yes yes the usual rant of a second child cussing about being passed hand me downs and cursing left right and centre of having the elder one sucking novelty out of my parents life of seeing me, the light of their life, the second one, and therefore by default the deprived one, treading a road well traveled (by the elder one).

Be it sleepless nights over admissions to school, the heinous board exams (so we couldn’t have cable in our home while the entire universe at the bus stop dissected, bisected and enacted wwf's and the bold and beautiful), or about admission to DU, the ragging, about late night parties (incidentally elder one did and i didnt..haha finally I did do something different….some rebel huh )The Elder had already been there, done that and by virtue of being "their" genetic offspring, The Parents too had been there and done that !!!

Its a pain having an elder one, so full of life and zestful. Attention craver!!
What is it with these first borns. First they perch the bar so far up there that even sergey bubka on steroids would find it impossible to vault over it. Second not content with a one off record they go off on a steeple chase of record braking pole vaults.

And then this flywheel momentum syndrome. First they have to a cajoled into doing something and once they start they just don’t stop. Look I only wanted The Elder to get married, Once!!!. Not thrice!!! And perhaps I did my fair share of goading(ok ok sheepish admission.. more than fair share. I pestered the Elder day in and day out). And looking back I ain't proud of my behavior!!!

But I am proud that The Elder ne'er did cave in and always ignored me and continues to do so with unwavering consistency on a whole host of affairs I still voice my wisdom on... but but but the point is The Elder had her way there too!!!

So off we are this winter seeing The Elder declare "I Do's" one more time. Down Under.

I have held back the moist glands on more than one occasion. And The Elder knows that!!
The Elder will not break me. Never!!!
But really I dont think I have the fortitude to have even one dry eye this time.

ps: Happy Holidays Folks!!! Wish you all a very merry X-Mas and the prosperity that has eluded you all these years!!!! ;)
See you around next year hobo dahling!!!